ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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