We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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