What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Randomize
