I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Holy shit dude........stairs
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
