she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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