My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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