Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
