yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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