In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
