imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
