Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
