Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
