... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
