Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
