hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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