we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
