Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
