What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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