Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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