apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
