You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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