You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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