everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
