Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
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