I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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