I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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