Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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