you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
