i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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