It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
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