So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
