but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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