i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
