He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
