so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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