Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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