She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
