I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I am one with the molecules
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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