If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
