is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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