You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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