He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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