i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
