I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
