toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Panties = found
Randomize
