So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
