you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
