You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
