I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
