His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
